Leading An Ethical Life Without Morals Part II
In the end, I flew down to SGH, taking Qiuyan and Ezo with me. For suddenly, mum's condition was diagnosed as CRITICAL, and have to be operated IMMEDIATELY. What the fuck. But of course, no one was ready to push her into the theatre until my physical presence was there, unless they like risking my wrath.
Anyway, the same surgeon was telling me on the phone that it HAS TO BE DONE, NOW, NOW, NOW. Now, the last thing I want is a repeat of the previous operation that had naive me believing YES, YES, YES, without consulting anyone, thinking yup, we can handle it on our own and yes, we had better let her be cut up and everything will be miraculously made okay again.
So my medicine friends were there to listen and to re-phrase the jargon for me, as well as triple check that all the important questions were asked and answered convincingly. Which they did, thank you, my dears.
So truly, the operation this time was unavoidable.
I'm doing all right. Just rather tired and frustrated mostly, that bad things constantly happens here, and never ends, and that mum's healed wound is re-opened again (so the body gaped)
and like, ouch, man, AGAIN!?
Apparently, there's intestinal blockage and it was causing a certain part to swell up. There's no way to clear the former, so the surgeon did a bypass thing such that fluids (acids, ezymes?) can flow. It was also noted that there were little specks there were attributed to cancer spread in the rest of the small intestines. Definitely progressive and no hope of halt. Mum's side will also most probably have a small tube inserted, connected (long term, I think) to the correlated intestine, such that in the event she can't eat via mouth, feeding can be done through it. In short, waiting to die.
Life just sucks so badly.
Boss called me to say don't worry about work and just stay by mum's side.
What has all the above to do with leading the ethical life?
I have a point, you know: Sometimes, leading the ethical life necessarily requires you to abandon dignity and pride, and be sincerely apologetic and ready to start anew. It is without morals because it may need you to be relativistic with regards to maxims and principles, or else, burn them altogether, in order for there to be a new beginning.
*
In my haste to get to SGH, I fell midway from the standard flight of steps. Couldn't grasp the railing 'coz both hands were carrying mum's stuff. So I just piak onto the ground. My face was spared, but I have a huge bump (I have two knees on my left leg now!) and both calve front bones are throbbing like crazy.
Life sucks, especially mine.
Good night, I'll be at SGH tomorrow and days after!
Anyway, the same surgeon was telling me on the phone that it HAS TO BE DONE, NOW, NOW, NOW. Now, the last thing I want is a repeat of the previous operation that had naive me believing YES, YES, YES, without consulting anyone, thinking yup, we can handle it on our own and yes, we had better let her be cut up and everything will be miraculously made okay again.
So my medicine friends were there to listen and to re-phrase the jargon for me, as well as triple check that all the important questions were asked and answered convincingly. Which they did, thank you, my dears.
So truly, the operation this time was unavoidable.
I'm doing all right. Just rather tired and frustrated mostly, that bad things constantly happens here, and never ends, and that mum's healed wound is re-opened again (so the body gaped)
and like, ouch, man, AGAIN!?
Apparently, there's intestinal blockage and it was causing a certain part to swell up. There's no way to clear the former, so the surgeon did a bypass thing such that fluids (acids, ezymes?) can flow. It was also noted that there were little specks there were attributed to cancer spread in the rest of the small intestines. Definitely progressive and no hope of halt. Mum's side will also most probably have a small tube inserted, connected (long term, I think) to the correlated intestine, such that in the event she can't eat via mouth, feeding can be done through it. In short, waiting to die.
Life just sucks so badly.
Boss called me to say don't worry about work and just stay by mum's side.
What has all the above to do with leading the ethical life?
I have a point, you know: Sometimes, leading the ethical life necessarily requires you to abandon dignity and pride, and be sincerely apologetic and ready to start anew. It is without morals because it may need you to be relativistic with regards to maxims and principles, or else, burn them altogether, in order for there to be a new beginning.
*
In my haste to get to SGH, I fell midway from the standard flight of steps. Couldn't grasp the railing 'coz both hands were carrying mum's stuff. So I just piak onto the ground. My face was spared, but I have a huge bump (I have two knees on my left leg now!) and both calve front bones are throbbing like crazy.
Life sucks, especially mine.
Good night, I'll be at SGH tomorrow and days after!
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home