The Depths Of Shallowness

Drowning, Drowning in Cynicism; Drunk, Drunk with Sentimentality; Down, Down with Love; Dunked, Dunked in Life. Desperate Discourse. Disposable Desires. Dusky Dreams. Delirium. Dignity. Despair. Doubt. Duty. Dewy Days. Divine Divide. Dump Everything that Bothers in The Depths of Defiance. 《我的快樂時代》唱爛 才領悟代價多高昂 不能滿足不敢停站 然後怎樣 All Rights Reserved ©Angeline Ang

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Location: Singapore

Tempestuous. Intense. Proud. Intellectual. Easily Bored. Consummate Performer. Very Chinese. Very Charming. Fair. Pale. Long, Curly, Black Hair. BA(Hons). Literature. Philosophy. Japanese. Law. Dense in Relationships. Denser in All Else. Brooding. Sceptical. Condescending. Daria Morgendorffer meets Kitiara Uth Matar meets Ally McBeal. Always dreamy, always cynical, always elusive. Struggling writer, artist and student, in that order please.

Saturday, May 13, 2006

在生活中坐以待毙

她一直满怀希望

人生偶尔会走上一条陌路
像是没有指标的地图

别让他们说你该知足
只有你知道什么是你的幸福

Life’s ordinariness is slowly but surely dawning upon me again. Oh, is there nothing to look forward to, in the days and months and years to come?

Beautante, who is making her way to a Master degree amidst guitar and other artistic endeavours, asked if I had plans to further my studies after completing my version of national service in Singapore.

Given that I’m not well-read in my majors – Philosophy and Literature, specializing in either is either gonna blind or kill me, whichever first. The former, is, nevertheless a more interesting option. The thought of thinking myself to death is particularly appealing. Master in Creative Writing, perhaps? It will make me write, for sure, and I can’t imagine being unhappy in that kind of situation. Master in anything will not be done in Singapore, and that adds to the attractiveness of things. Unless I decide to really, really continue with a 3-yr law degree in NUS and end once and for all the what-ifs and if-onlys.

I could always work overseas.

I could always pack up and leave.

There must be meaning in life. I just have to look harder, I guess.

*

Finance Head: Oi! You know with new changes to the scheme, you don’t get anything? Cut down on your spending hor. No tai-tai wannabe activities, please.

Me: I know already lah. Thanks for reminding me about my pending impoverished circumstance.

I was quite amused by my concerned friend worrying about my projected poverty. Well, life goes on, so we still need to spend.

*

Escapism comes in the form of movies, and here’s the backlog of my numerous attempts to run away from real life.

Lately, 《茉莉花开》- I swear repetition has never been less fatalistic with a difference. Minxiu, you have to catch this when you are back. It shatters our conception that the unholy trinity ie three stories told in a movie (think 《最好的時光》 and Eros) is bound to be incomprehensibly bad, two out of three plots. Now I must buy the Chinese novel from which it is adapted from.And did I mention 陆毅 is hot? No, I do not know who he is either. But. He is the actor who plays 邹杰 the leading man in the second story.


《黑社会2以和为贵》- I watched this with Best Friend in Bedok Princess after Polling Day. The timeliness was uncanny. So Best Friend had to put up with my occasional smart aleck whispers of “I can just so imagine our own elections taking place like this behind close doors” and “wah political allegory that we can relate to!!! (I swear there are glaring similarities)” and “politics is 黑社会 legalised and legitimized.” I heard there’s gonna be a third installment. Go here for an in depth forum exchange and analysis (wah so like our cyber election exposes too!!!).

如果说,影片前两集是对现实的映射,那么,第三集将是影片对现实的展望了

Don’t give up. Change can and will occur in the third generation. And changes have to occur, because absolute power corrupts absolutely. That is what the very wise old man (who is kinda heading the whole team even though he has retired, ahem) believes. Watch the movie to see why and how.


And I watched Aquamarine. Like I said, I’m running away from real life, okay. Next!

Thanks to Beautante’s invite, MirrorMask was complimentary. The movie was really, really cool, alive with lush colours and fantastic artwork. Gorgeous. And oh, the angst of growing up!!! The bildungsroman was well-handled and for once, I didn’t feel like killing myself watching character development on screen. The clever cleverness was also deftly executed in terms of structuring the parallel/doppelganger worlds. Lovely, I pronounced.

SIFF – I only manage to catch three movies this time round. As usual, my Japanese choice will not let me down.

It’s Only Talk

Festival favorite Ryuichi Hiroki (Vibrator, L'Amant) returns with this sensitive, low-key portrait of an emotionally unstable woman and the four men in her life.
Director Ryuichi Hiroki has become a Philadelphia Film Festival staple in recent years: his film Vibrator screened here two years ago, and Mr. Hiroki attended our fest last year with his movie L'Amant. His newest work, It's Only Talk, harkens back to the sensitive female character study of Vibrator, but it's still a bit of a departure for Hiroki - the film's emphasis is not on explicit sexuality, and his denouement does not offer easy redemption for the film's female protagonist. Yuko (Vibrator star Shinobu Terajima) is a single, unemployed woman in her mid-30s with a critical dependence on medication prescribed for her manic depression. She is in various levels of involvement with four men: a cousin with whom she shares a sexual attraction; a taciturn young gangster who shares her depressive condition; a self-described pervert whom she encountered online; and an old college classmate with a political future, but an inability to relate to Yuko romantically. With this quiet, introspective drama, Hiroki subtly implies that one of these four figures in Yuko's life will provide her with the emotional transformation that she so desperately needs, but the answer isn't that simple. With a melancholy conclusion that will haunt the viewer long after the closing credits roll, Hiroki leaves us with the message that true change must emanate from within. In the process, he confirms his status as one of Japan's most fascinating filmmakers." (synopsis taken from PFF)

The screenplay for It's Only Talk was written by Haruhiko Arai, based on the novel
Ittsu onrî tôku by Akiko Itoyama. The movie stars Shinobu Terajima, Etsushi Toyokawa, Shunsuke Matsuoka, Tomorowo Taguchi, Satoshi Tsumabuki, Akira Emoto, and Nao Ômori.

It’s more than a love story, it’s about the struggle to live and struggling to understand what it means to exist.

Excellent review writing here that does justice to a very powerful film.


The Art Of Flirting – As Told In Four Chapters
Spot on for guy-girl dynamics. Spinning off stereotypes but it’s sadly true. There’s a reason why cliches are cliches. I enjoyed this.

I Love Cinema
Blah. Yuck.


*

I just want meaning from life.

I shall defer brooding over it by finishing Anna Karenina and working over the weekend.

安定的日子不一定就是幸福
忘不掉她在心里做过的梦
她今年农历三月六号刚满二十二
刚甩开课本要离开家看看这世界
却发现许多烦恼要面对

秋天是忽然间就来临
青春虽然有本钱可以洒脱
一场恋爱二十二个月就结束
才知道有些感情不值得赌

九月天气还是有点热
她想公车再不来就走一走路

她开始明白等待未必有结果
一个人也能走上梦的旅途

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