The Depths Of Shallowness

Drowning, Drowning in Cynicism; Drunk, Drunk with Sentimentality; Down, Down with Love; Dunked, Dunked in Life. Desperate Discourse. Disposable Desires. Dusky Dreams. Delirium. Dignity. Despair. Doubt. Duty. Dewy Days. Divine Divide. Dump Everything that Bothers in The Depths of Defiance. 《我的快樂時代》唱爛 才領悟代價多高昂 不能滿足不敢停站 然後怎樣 All Rights Reserved ©Angeline Ang

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Tempestuous. Intense. Proud. Intellectual. Easily Bored. Consummate Performer. Very Chinese. Very Charming. Fair. Pale. Long, Curly, Black Hair. BA(Hons). Literature. Philosophy. Japanese. Law. Dense in Relationships. Denser in All Else. Brooding. Sceptical. Condescending. Daria Morgendorffer meets Kitiara Uth Matar meets Ally McBeal. Always dreamy, always cynical, always elusive. Struggling writer, artist and student, in that order please.

Sunday, October 16, 2005

Beyond The Story Live 2005

曾经满载了希望 你我会有天冲开黑暗
谁知再次的失望 看这里已经走到尽头
望着你走远我并没有心酸
唯望天边一方它朝可重逢

oh para paradise只想跟你一起一起走向这一天

oh para paradise风中希冀一点今天一再想起你

宁可永远的等待 也怕背弃当初的一切
如今你远走彼岸 告诉我哪边天色好吗

My heart stopped for a moment as I heard the first strains of rock music. Damn, damn, damn. I had just stepped out of the car and the stadium was still a distance away. Minxiu was incredulous when I insisted the concert must have begun. Hey, it’s only 8.20pm, he reminded.

Yes, it’s only 8.20pm. Concerts held at the Indoor Stadium never start on time. Never. Count yourself lucky if it starts half an hour later. I have waited for an hour before.

This is actually my first time running late. I’m usually seated the 15 minutes before. And of course, since Murphy’s Law always applies, the concert happily ran without me!!! Ahhhhhh.

I missed 1.5 songs, after checking with the rabid fan next to me. Okay. I can live with that.

*

Concert: Beyond The Story Live 2005
Ticket Price: $148 (top tier premiere seat)

Notable points:

(1) I willingly forked out the money to listen to what I presumed correctly will be mainly Cantopop. And I do not understand Cantonese. At all.


(2) I own 4 Beyond CDs but the actual Beyond songs I am familiar with do not exceed 10, of which more than half are Chinese hits.

(3) This is blasphemous (and really unacceptable), but I can still confuse 家 强 with 贯 中 – After so many years, I still think that the resemblance between the two is stronger than 家 强 and 家 驹.

(4) I find 世 荣 to be most attractive but prefer 贯 中’s power voice.

(5) I still remember how I got wind of 家 驹’s death – it was early morning and I was on my way to Dunman High (when it hasn’t shifted to Tanjong Rhu), and people around me on the bus were talking about it. I couldn’t believe it and sought confirmation.

(6) I was never a Beyond fan, but I love what they represented and the fact they had tried to change the world through the songs, some of which are political (I adore 长 城 to death).

Point 6 was reason enough for me to buy the most expensive tickets on the first day of public sales. No regrets, really. They are the very last surviving and living iconic Hong Kong personalities since the demise of Leslie and Anita, and even longer back, Danny (Seriously, Minxiu, with all due respect, I don’t think Jackie Cheung counts – It’s all about Cantopop in its heydays and Jackie wasn’t quite there, then, yet). Henceforth, we can only be nostalgic about a lost era that we are made to be fonder of because we can only imagine and believe how glorious it was, having never participated or created it.

It was strange. But since Beyond started their music career in 1983, I would imagine most of their fans to be in late thirties or so. But the fans around Minxiu and I were all looking our age. Very bizarre. Are they, like me, also haunted (or more likely, seduced) by the illusory loveliness of an imagined period, made all the more haunting because of a hankering after what is not here, not now, and never in-the-present. I’m not sure why Minxiu went either. He is definitely not a Beyond fan and probably knows less songs than I do, and might possibly not own any Beyond CDs. So. That’s the power of the band. What great draw you must possess to get people who never even know your songs to buy the priciest concert tickets to catch you in action. What icons you must be; how evocative and provocative you must be, to manifest yourselves into these meanings and representations that matter to the majority.

The majority was a full house. Every single freaking seat was filled up. Well for my kinda seats, they were empty, cos every single freaking person was standing up, right from the start. Urgh! The perils of being tiny. I had to be on my toes throughout just to catch 家 强 and 贯 中 playing and jamming, if I so chose to ignore help from the big screens. 世 荣 was on a raised platform but his handsome mug was constantly blocked by his drum sets and half shadowed attractively by long dirty blond locks. Our seats were very good (I was right in front of 家 强), but not good enough, thanks to my lack of height.

The three forty something men played up the three ideal male images tonight. 贯 中 was the sullen cooler than cool punk rocker with his tattooed and veined (yay!) arms. 世 荣 was the archetypal charismatic strong silent drifter (very Japanese appearance) who made himself heard through his drumming and the occasional crooning of a slow love song during which he took centrestage. 家 强 was the decent, serious Prince Charming with an edge in well-pressed, long-sleeved shirts. Very nice visual contrast as he powered through the heavy rock numbers and easily eased himself into the sentimental ballads.

In between songs, clips of a younger Beyond were flashed. We pedaled lightly through the years, and saw 家 驹 again, heard his voice and remembered. There will always be unkind critics who questioned the motives of such playback. I see this as respect, tribute and devotion. He was the leader of the band after all. He wrote most of their material. He wasn’t supposed to leave so early in life. There were some people who cried when they saw and heard 家 驹 again.

*

Having neither the All Access or Media pass in my possession this time, I shamelessly sms-ed my friend covering the event to sneak me in backstage or invite me to any post-concert reception and/or party. But invites and passes were tightly controlled, so. Sigh. My friend promised to send me pictures though. Hey, autographs plus posters hor, if you can, I added.

Just not my night, I guess.

In addition to being the Concert that started the earliest in the history of Concerts, Beyond The Story Live 2005 was also the Concert without an Encore and the shortest Concert ever, clocking at 2 hours and 20 mins, usually concerts by superstars last a lot longer.

*

Questions: Why have they separated in the first place? Have they finally depleted their idealism after more than two decades of fighting for, against and with The Establishment? Are they throwing in the towel?

I don’t care.

If it helps, in some silent, quiet way, since they would never know, they are and will always be an inspiration to me.


今天我寒夜里看雪飘过怀著冷却了的心窝飘远方风雨里追赶
雾里分不清影踪天空海阔你与我 可会变(谁没在变)

多少次迎著冷眼与嘲笑从没有放弃过心中的理想一刹那恍惚
若有所失的感觉不知不觉已变淡 心里爱(谁明白我)

原谅我这一生不羁放纵
爱自由也会怕有一天会跌倒
被弃了理想谁人都可以
那会怕有一天只你共我

仍然自由自我 永远高唱我歌 走遍千里

2 Comments:

Blogger cinewhore said...

I went because I felt I should go and see them (before they were gone forever - but is there a forever in showbiz anyway?) and try to get a feeling of what they were really about. I bought the top tier seats because you wanted them, and there was some money thing which I don't remember, and you also subsidized part of it. And I enjoyed myself because I like good rock and the crowd was great.

And I own some Beyond CDs OK. Well, two. One greatest hits album and the CD of this concert.

And I also see that I don't really have to blog about this concert since you've done it all for me.

PS: After reading your post, I finally know who each of them are!

*Beyond fans everywhere call for my death by stoning*

11:26 PM  
Blogger Angeline said...

now i remember, the small subsidy was a very belated birthday gift, because the Viagra didn't count :X

i shall cast the first stone at you for not bringing your camera when it matters!!!

*throws stone*

11:37 PM  

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