The Depths Of Shallowness

Drowning, Drowning in Cynicism; Drunk, Drunk with Sentimentality; Down, Down with Love; Dunked, Dunked in Life. Desperate Discourse. Disposable Desires. Dusky Dreams. Delirium. Dignity. Despair. Doubt. Duty. Dewy Days. Divine Divide. Dump Everything that Bothers in The Depths of Defiance. 《我的快樂時代》唱爛 才領悟代價多高昂 不能滿足不敢停站 然後怎樣 All Rights Reserved ©Angeline Ang

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Tempestuous. Intense. Proud. Intellectual. Easily Bored. Consummate Performer. Very Chinese. Very Charming. Fair. Pale. Long, Curly, Black Hair. BA(Hons). Literature. Philosophy. Japanese. Law. Dense in Relationships. Denser in All Else. Brooding. Sceptical. Condescending. Daria Morgendorffer meets Kitiara Uth Matar meets Ally McBeal. Always dreamy, always cynical, always elusive. Struggling writer, artist and student, in that order please.

Wednesday, February 28, 2007

The Ivory Maiden

Tell me, which is easier a quest for the modern knight, finding a discontinued Coach design in a factory outlet in America or transporting a box of Krispy Kreme doughnuts home?

Of course he has other things to do apart from entertaining a frivolous maiden in her imagined moment of boredom. But the knight is ready to prove himself worthy once again, as he had in previous stories when the return was triumphant. He, armed with Baileys from The States, and like when, he had brought back a treasured painting from Bintan that she had most unwillingly left behind so once upon a time.

Still, her hand is her own and her heart is hers, for he has never asked and she has never offered.

So, she sends him on quests and he gallantly goes. How this tale will end, nobody knows.

Saturday, February 24, 2007

Totally Unrelated SMS Stories & Food Tales

Thanks to MX and his vow to play the field henceforth which I gather is to QC less and strike more often with the 宁可杀错不可放过 mantra, 我又有了约会的心情 – funny how it rubs off and renders the principled frugality in affection towards the male in question suddenly pointless. Why should I worry about sending out the wrong signals when I truly enjoy his company? In short, why guess and not grasp (the metaphysical concept, please)? There is little need, and use for restraint when I’ve always been exuberant and he knows that.

Me: Hi! Dinner next week?

He: Hi hi. Sorry, I should be not in Singapore next week. Plan quite vague now, but one way or another, I will not be around. Am leaving for US or for the seas nearby. How about the week after next?

Me: This is for vacation right?

He: Ha, Rubbish, both are for serious work.

Me: 没想到公子你三十不到,竟能到美国游走两趟,真令人煞慕。(NB: insider’s joke, sorry)

He: 到美国两次是对的。但不是游览,而是认真公干。

Me: 好吧,那就辛苦了。等你回来再一起出去玩。


Actually I also mentioned that I have signed up for a romantic getaway with Best Friend and will be doing couple therapy so I will also be unavailable on those dates. I certainly hope he reads that correctly: on whom I’m doing couple therapy with. Sigh.

*

Ezo: Hey I got a legal question to ask. You think Mr Veins will entertain? Can give me his number?

Me: *immediately* No. And I really don’t have his number.

I apologise if I sound curt or even higher powers forbid, bitter, well. I suppose it is because WTF, I am curt and bitter can!! If Mr Vein has been steadily ignoring the two smses (both requiring simple answers ie dinner next week?) sent out during the past one year from me, can I say with confidence he will reply to you? No, I can’t. And since I cannot bring myself to call him, I have blithely concluded he has changed numbers and so darling, I really don’t have his number anymore.

Mr Veins is History!!! Over the past two weeks, it was as if a spell was lifted. I suddenly recalled all the horrid things I had to put up with just so we can hang out at his leisure, of his planning and the silent dates, and my stomach churned at the playback. I must have been insane to think this was FUN, SPECIAL, QUAINT!? Oh well, better now than never. This is the amusing cautionary tale that I can tell during stayovers and gatherings. We need to have someone like that to spice things up right.

*

In other news of worth and note, I just gave Italian food another chance to impress me. Yes, I have something against pasta and I just usually go for thin crust pizzas when forced to eat in an Italian establishment. Had lunch with WY today at Pasta Brava. As the name suggests, it’s Pasta Land! But I had prepared myself to eat exactly that. Soup was good. Bread and olive oil below average. Risotto (fine, so that’s rice, cannot meh) and something that’s lagsane-like but with minced lamb instead were okay edible. It’s atas muifan (rice in gravy – a Chinese dish) and dressed up mutarbak, the unworldly couple giggled. Ha. But the desserts were gooooooooooood. I had a Panna Cotta while WY has some vanilla and chocolate gelato laced with liquor which we both really liked. The consistent good thing was the company. Yay!

So has Pasta Brava changed my worldview on pasta? Well, it has certainly made me very full. I shall hold on to the belief that Italian desserts are very yummy. The nicest pasta I ever had such that I slurped up every single strand, though admittedly the portion - part of a set dinner - was a small one, was at Il Lido. Like ooooooooooooooooh. But I shall take that as a one-off digression.

More food fancies on the same day ie today – hotpot dinner at Terence Cao’s newly opened restaurant with Ruth, April & Chinyi, followed by 2 hours of gaming at The Mind Café. I’m so gonna die from overeating.

Addendum: The hotpot was delicious and the winter melon soup base excellent. Terence gave me a 10% discount and desserts on the house. Yay! He so nice and PR. Then again, between the four of us, we also spent $165 even after the discount.

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

单身无罪 快乐有理

To my posse of intelligent, independent, beautiful and amusing girlfriends, you are not alone and I love you.

To myself: 宁缺勿滥


*

I hereby reproduce an article courtesy of Best Friend to me 5 years ago.
(Note to Best Friend: Yes, I have kept it)

======================================

JUST GOOD FRIENDS

They have good jobs, good looks and a whole lot of fun. But what they don't have is a boyfriend. Can a best friend ever be a decent substitute? Sally Weale reports

Monday August 5, 2002
The Guardian

There is a touching scene at the end of Lynn Alleway's latest documentary film in which two young women snuggle up to each other in a taxi travelling through rainy late-night London after an evening out on the town. They haven't pulled, they haven't been picked up, but it has been a good night. They are going home, not alone, but with each other. "You realise how much I love you, don't you?" one says drunkenly to the other. She struggles to find words to express the strength of her feeling. "Everything - just about everything."


"And I love you too," the other reciprocates. One girl nestles her head on the other's shoulder, they look like contented lovers. At home, they wash, put on nightshirts and clamber into a double bed before wishing each other good night, switching off the light and going to sleep. It is a sweet ending to a bittersweet film about being single. The two women featured, Kerrie Stone, 27, and Luciana Ferreira, 31, look as though they have it all. They are both extremely good-looking, they have great jobs, they have bought their own homes. They have both been in long-term relationships and have even been engaged, but are now single and, like so many women, Alleway suggests, are struggling to understand why.

The backdrop to much of the film is clubland - furtive glances across smoke-filled rooms, couples dancing intimately, passionate first-night kisses. But invariably Kerrie, from Northampton, and Brazilian-born Lu come home alone.

"I have no idea why we are single," says Kerrie. "Maybe we go for unsuitable guys, maybe we're a bit scared to let each other go." She adds a bit later: "Lu and I are a couple, all bar the sex." And it's true. Most of the time, they look like they don't really need anyone else. Why would you bother when you have such a great time together?

During the eight months of filming, they are utterly inseparable; they call each other constantly, see each other most days and holiday together. They get ready to go out together; two sets of clothes laid out on one bed (complete with silicon breast-boosting pads); they do their make-up at the same mirror, and reassure each other about how they look. They even finish off each other's jokes ("Me-e-e-n are like a box of chocolates," Kerrie starts in a Jerry Hall-style drawl. "You never know whatcha gonna get," Luciana finishes for her, amid gales of laughter.

Alleway, producer and director of Sex, Guys and Videotape, made the film after becoming single again at the end of a 23-year relationship. "There have been many, many column inches written and much said about the state of being single. What I wanted to do was to make a film which gave a more complete picture of what it's really like.

"The truth is there are many, many wonderful highs about being single, but there are many lows, and few single women are prepared to admit how painful it is. Kerrie's way of dealing with being single is having a close woman friend to support her. I think that happens to a lot of women. They very easily slip into quite intimate relationships with other women. We live in a culture where friends are the new family.

"The highs of being single are being absolutely proud of yourself, that you are independent, you can do anything and the world is your oyster. The truth is it's fantastic to go out on a Saturday night and feel anything can happen. But it's a world a million times removed from having a decent relationship with someone."

And then there's the other side to being single, which we see mainly through Kerrie, who is heroically candid throughout the film. Alleway shows her deliriously excited about a first date, who telephones on camera to cancel. It is crushing. We see her getting off with a footballer on holiday in Spain, who doesn't call her in the UK. We see her upset and left out when Lu's relationships seem to be taking off - though none last for long. Like an old couple with a lifetime behind them, she worries aboutbeing the one left alone. "I would always want to be the one who went first, rather than being left behind.

"I do feel lonely sometimes," she admits. "As much as I can claim I am happy - life's a dream and I'm in charge of my life - it's nice for somebody else to make those decisions for me sometimes. I'd like a boyfriend to complete what I've got. I know I've done well in what I do. As long as I carry on working, I know I will succeed there. Why can't any of us bloody succeed with men?" she asks.

And that is the nub of the film. Women are succeeding in every other sphere of life. They are independent, they have careers, they can pay for their own drinks, their own cars and their own mortgages, but why can't they meet the right men? "I have to say anecdotally, my personal experience is that the quality of men who are available nowhere near matches the quality of the women," says Alleway. "You can talk to any of the dating agencies and they will all say, "I've got 200 women on my books and 50 men" and the men don't match the quality of the women. It feels as if there is a shortage of half-decent men who are not gay or bisexual and the supply is diminishing."

Alleway's theory is that the lack of men is due partly to the increase in men coming out as gay. "It has taken men out of the market in large numbers. Twenty years ago, these men would be bisexual and they would get married, have children and struggle with their sexuality and perhaps have the odd fling with a man but stay in the relationship with the woman, for the sake of conformity."

Her other theory is that relationships today are more difficult because of divorce. "Both Kerrie and Lu, their parents are divorced. It can instil in someone an anxiety, to the point where they are over-anxious about forming a relationship because they are trying to prove to themselves they can do it better. They want to prove to themselves that marriage can work despite their own experiences. The other way it works, and this applies to a lot of men, is it makes them frightened of commitment. Being in a steady relationship triggers some deep alarm bells somewhere, so they are less likely to rush into a committed relationship.

"Those sorts of experiences are never going to encourage us to throw ourselves headlong into a relationship. It knocks confidence and raises your expectations in an unrealistic way. A lot of people are determined to get things right, and are very aware of what a relationship should be. "

I meet Kerrie at the nightclub where she works as a marketing manager. Kerrie is worried that the film makes her look needy, and explains that last year, when filming took place, was a particularly bad one for her romantically, but lots of good things happened too. She got promoted, she bought a bigger, better flat and now she is driving her own Audi TT sports car. She is seeing someone at the moment - it is still early days, but she likes him.

She thinks there may be some truth in Alleway's theory about divorce. Not only are Kerrie's parents divorced; her mother and stepfather have recently separated and her younger brother's marriage has ended in divorce. "Yes, it may be a factor. I think it's terrible. Infidelity is the norm. It's almost condoned. There's no happy ever after any more." She also believes that men are intimidated by women who have learned to be assertive at work as well as in their personal lives. "Lu and I are in complete charge of our lives. We finance our own cars, homes and social lives. It's not so much that we need men any more, it's a matter of choice. We've evolved. We've realised we don't need a man. And the men out there are not such a great calibre."

Men do not come out of the film well. They are either drunken and lecherous or simply ridiculous. There is a very funny moment when Lu and Kerrie are on holiday in Spain. They are lying on sunbeds, in their bikinis, while a drunken, dishevelled Englishman (who turns out to be a leading snooker star) pesters them, finally leaving with their newspaper and a farewell belch. "That's why we're single," Kerrie fires at the camera.

Lu, who has a corporate job with a Spanish bank, does not like the film's final cut,which she feels concentrates too much on dating and has missed out the interesting debate about men and women and their difficulties in forming relationships. "With the men and women of our generation, the women are brought up by parents who will encourage them to be successful and independent, but they are still bringing up men to have the same traditional roles as provider and protector. That creates a huge problem when the two have to integrate. You can't. Realistically, like everyone else, I would like to meet somebody that I see a future with, but I'm less tolerant of people than maybe my mother was. I don't need somebody to support me financially."

Lu would prefer to be single than to settle for second best. As she says in the film: "I'm never going to settle for something mediocre in terms of a relationship. I like myself enough to know that I give 100 per cent and deserve 100 per cent back."

Kerrie, meanwhile, may drive an Audi TT and have two bathrooms in her new flat, but she is still sweetly romantic. "I still believe in the fairy tale. I would like to meet somebody. I would like to live with them, marry and have children and I have every belief that I will find that right person. I believe he is out there for me."

Sunday, February 11, 2007

原谅你不再送花 伤口应要结疤

After hearing the cantonese version for more than 200 times on repeat mode, it's obvious the version I'm partial too. Nevertheless there are some beautifully wrought 神来之笔 Chinese phrases in here that I would be proud to call my own in spite of the forced rhyming here and there. Lin Xi is the most lyrical songwriter be it in Mandarin or Cantonese.

In matters of agenda-ful projection, I think both songs serve their purpose. Where there's no use in pondering over what cannot and dare not be asked, there's use in appropriating lyrics to entertain the modest hope for closure by the unfulfilled self languishing in existential angst of the most plebeian sort. I will do better the next time round. Let the screw-ups stay the way they are.

陈奕迅 爱情转移 (富士山下)国语版歌词
电影《爱情呼叫转移》主题曲
吴德海制作作曲:Christopher Chak 作词:林夕
编曲:陈珀 / C.Y.Kong 监制:Alvin Leong

徘徊过多少橱窗 住过多少旅馆 才会觉得分离也并不冤枉
感情是用来浏览 还是用来珍藏 好让日子天天都过的难忘
熬过了多少患难 湿了多少眼眶 才能知道伤感是爱的遗产
流浪几张双人床 换过几次信仰 才让戒指义无反顾的交换

把一个人的温暖 转移到另一个的胸膛 让上次犯的错反省出梦想
每个人都是这样 享受过提心吊胆 才拒绝做爱情待罪的羔羊
回忆是抓不到的月光握紧就变黑暗 等虚假的背景消失于晴朗
阳光在身上流转 等所有业障被原谅 爱情不停站 想开往地老天荒 需要多勇敢

烛光照亮了晚餐 照不出个答案 恋爱不是温馨的请客吃饭
床单上铺满花瓣 拥抱让它成长 太拥挤就开到了别的土壤
感情需要人接班 接近换来期望 期望带来失望的恶性循环
短暂的总是浪漫 漫长总会不满 烧完美好青春换一个老伴

把一个人的温暖 转移到另一个的胸膛 让上次犯的错反省出梦想
每个人都是这样 享受过提心吊胆 才拒绝做爱情待罪的羔羊
回忆是抓不到的月光握紧就变黑暗 等虚假的背景消失于晴朗
阳光在身上流转 等所有业障被原谅 爱情不停站 想开往地老天荒 需要多勇敢

你不要失望 荡气回肠是为了 最美的平凡

*

And here's a critical analysis of 《富士山下》- I can't agree with the insights more.

“富士山下”与其它大部份的林夕作品一样,都是用以表达林夕的人生观——放下回忆的包袱,珍惜眼前人(其实无论体裁有多大的差异,但林夕几乎所有的词作主旨都是走向同一个点的,只要能领悟林夕的人生观,就很容易可以参透他每一首词)。而具体到“富士山下 ”本身,是一首劝导人们放下一段感情的歌,就像近期他写的“情永落”、“情歌”差不多 ,只不过这次换成第一人称的视觉,去劝导自己的前任女朋友而已。      

“拦路雨偏似雪花 饮泣的你冻吗 这风褛我给你磨到有襟花”   
“连掉了迹也不怕 怎么始终牵挂 苦心选中今天想车你回家”      

最三两句是用来营造全首歌的整体意境。因为“富士山下”的旋律和配乐本身就有一种冬天的情调,因此,林夕在这里用了“拦 路雨”、“雪花”、“饮泣”、“冻”、“风褛”等词去营造寒冷的感觉,亦开始铺展整个 故事的前序——对自己怀有很深感情的女主角,选了非常严寒的一天(衬托出悲凉),穿着一 件自己送给她而又很残旧——掉了迹(本人生活在南方,不清楚普通话有没有这种说法,“ 掉了迹”在粤语里就是褪色的意思。另外,如果你所看到的版本是“调了职也不怕”,那是 印刷出错)——的风褛(表示对自己的思念),要求自己送她回家。

“原谅我不再送花 伤口应要结疤 花瓣铺满心里坟场才害怕”   
“如若你非我不嫁 彼此终必火化”   
“一生一世等一天需要代价”      

第二小段,林夕继续用“结疤”“花瓣”“坟场”“火化”几个词去深化华丽而伤感的雪景。同时开始讲述自己的立场——我们的感情已经结束了,因此我不会再给你送花(泛指一切热恋时的缠绵),因为此时再送花给你而勾起大家心里面的记忆还使我们不知所重。即使你认为今生只能爱我一个人,但我们这段感情已经无法弥补了,而我们始终还是要死去的 。而“一生一世等一天需要代价”的意思就是:在有限的余生里这样消耗短暂的岁月是没有价值的。      

“情人节不要说穿 只敢抚你发端 这种姿态可会令你更心酸”   

在情人节的时候(泛指情侣之间的各种纪念日),虽然我知道你对我还存在爱意,但我只能够以朋友身份的关怀去回报你,你种做法是不是令你更心疼呢?      

“留在汽车里取暖 应该怎么规劝 怎么可以将手腕忍痛划损”      

这里要回到第一小段的是场景,自己正开着车送女主角回家,而因为寒冷的天气,再加上女主角本来就志不在家,因此在途中肯定会有插曲(顺带一提“取暖”、“规劝”、“划损”这三个词,不但韵律工整,而且也和全首曲的意境和当时的场景配合得天衣无缝,还不落俗套,真是佩服林夕的天才词感)。在车子内休息的期间,我究竟应该怎样劝谕你,你怎能够为了爱情这么轻易地放弃自己 的生命呢?      

“人活到几岁算短 失恋只有更短 归家需要几里路谁能预算”      

这是典型的林夕式句子,充满哲理之余还余音荡荡,馀韵犹存,相信各位都能够体会,我还是不要译了。      

“忘掉我跟你恩怨 樱花开了几转 东京之旅一早比一世遥远”      

当你忘记我们之间的恩怨情仇之时,已经不知道过了多少个寒暑了。人人都会说余生想要做什么什么,但既然已经想到了为何不马上去做呢?你有生之年可能还有机会去一趟东京旅行,但要你明天(就是尽快的意思)就去,却很难做到了。      

“谁都只得那双手 靠拥抱亦难任(为)你拥有 要拥有必先懂失去怎接受”      

开始切入主题,直接讲道理。我们彼此都是血肉之躯(真实的人,即不是电视剧里完美爱情的男女主角),一个人无论如何努力地展示自己的爱意,也不一定能完全拥有另一个人,如果真的要学会如何最大限度的维系一段感情,就必须曾经了解失去一段感情是什么滋味。  

“曾沿着雪路浪游 为何为好事泪流 谁能凭爱意要富士山私有”      

这里就是表达这首词的中心思想。这是林夕的原话“其实,你喜欢一个人,就像喜欢富士山。你可以看到它,但是不能搬走它。你有什么方法可以移动一座富士山,回答是,你自己走过去。爱情也如此,逛过就已经足够”。因此,这几句词的意思就是,我们都曾经一起漫步过白雪(就是经历过甜蜜时光),即使 相爱是一件这么美好的事情,你为何现在要流泪呢?一个人是无论如何都不能移动一座富士山的。      

“何不把悲哀感觉 假设是来自你虚构 试管里找不到它染污眼眸”      
"试管里找不到它染污眼眸"

取自英文句子——can not identify sadness through test tube。整句话的意思是:悲伤不是一种实质的东西,不能从试管里(化学,比喻真实的 物质)里提炼出来,既然如此,为何不把这种感觉当成是虚构的呢?     
 
“前尘硬化像石头 随缘地抛下便逃走”   
“我绝不罕有 往街里绕过一周 我便化乌有”      

过去的往事已经成为历史了,随着时间的流逝就可以忘掉。这个世界上没有谁是谁唯一的伴侣,只要你真诚地去寻找,很快就会找到另一个,而我也会从你的回忆里消失。      

“你还嫌不够 我把这陈年风褛 送赠你解咒”  
    
如果我说了这么多你都还是未能放下我的话,我不如把这件陈年风褛,送给你就当作是我的存在好了。

文:九时用茶@TMCA 转自:天涯音评会

Thursday, February 08, 2007

A Matter Of Prudence & Principle

Over lunch today, Beautante and I were discussing how it should be mandatory that the government dispatch a Welcome-To-The-Real-World Pack to all hapless despairing young adults trying to make sense of These Things they are suddenly expected to grapple with when they start working. Inside will be Very Useful Information like how to file/pay your income tax (I have no idea as the company does it for me), a glossary of cheem terms found in insurance documents (like the different riders, co-insurance and deductibles), the How To Book (How To Buy Right Insurance, How To Be Content, How To Cope When Stupid People Are Everywhere etc) and The Sign Book (Signs You Are Growing A Worry Wart, Signs You Are Getting Too Comfortable, Signs You Are Right You Are In A Dead End Job etc). Okay, so I thought of the last two only now but I need My Package can!!!!

Just that morning, and I mean, Morning 2am, I went through my finances and really mulled over the Aviva’s MyShield policy I bought into some months back. I had come across a disturbing article on how it has refused to pay one claimant on the ground of ‘pre-existing condition.’ The claim was rejected because the Aviva plan “excludes all pre-existing conditions regardless of whether there is disclosure or non-disclosure or whether the insured has knowledge of the condition.”

Now how in the world do you conclude in absolute terms that one has a pre-existing condition?

Rival insurers AIA, Great Eastern (GE), NTUC Income and Prudential have no issue with the claim and would have done the payout accordingly.

Should I switch? As far as I see it, well previously, Aviva offers the best value for $, but that was before this article (see below) made me see the light. If I were to play safe, probably I would advise myself to look for AIA MyShield or GE Supreme Health Plus. The latter is definitely cheaper compared to AIA but AIA’s premiums and service give me peace of mind.

I hate growing up. I hate worrying about money: where to find it, where to park it everywhere saved where to spend (heh so witty) it. I should be Hopelessly In Love or something. Sigh. And who can I talk to about my practical doubts instead of airing them to agents who have their economic agenda? Friends are usually as confused and clueless, or couldn’t care any lesser. Anyway I did some homework and dug out some Medisave-approved integrated plan comparisons, plus more links to the aviva story.

I need My Welcome Pack!!!


And as A Matter of Prudence & Principle, I would most likely switch plans and company altogether.


STRAITS TIMES - Jan 31, 2007

'Pre-existing condition' strikes out cancer patient's insurance claim
Plan excludes coverage, but some rival firms say they would have paid
By Finance Correspondent, Lorna Tan

A 45-YEAR-OLD woman diagnosed with breast cancer thought her medical bill was covered by her insurance policy, but a rude shock awaited her.

Backed by medical reports, her insurer Aviva said that the 9cm lump found in her breast had begun growing before her policy took effect.

It refused to pay, saying her cancer was a pre-existing condition at the time that she signed up for her MyShield hospitalisation policy - never mind that she had no idea at the time.

Fortunately for Ms Simone Vaz, her company has paid for the bulk of her medical bills. She also managed to receive payouts from two critical illness policies, one of which she had signed up for at the same time as her MyShield plan.

Still, her case has turned the spotlight on an often-overlooked but vital issue in medical insurance - the definition of a pre-existing condition.

And the details of Ms Vaz's case underline the complexity of the question and the differing approaches of insurers in dealing with the question.

She signed up for a MyShield plan with Aviva here in January last year and it took effect on April 1. Based in Shanghai, Ms Vaz works as a communications manager at a telecommunications firm.

She was not required to take a health test by Aviva.

Prior to that, the last time she had a health check was in 2004 when she applied for her China visa. Ms Vaz had never undergone a mammogram prior to the diagnosis.

The first indication that something was amiss occurred during a spa massage in Shanghai in mid-June last year when she experienced pain.

She saw a doctor in Singapore and was diagnosed as having advanced or 'stage three' breast cancer. The tumour in her breast was removed immediately at Mount Alvernia Hospital.

Her initial medical bill of $15,000 was rejected by Aviva on the grounds that the condition existed before her policy was issued.

Aviva backed this up with medical opinion.

In a letter to Ms Vaz's lawyer, Aviva stated that independent medical specialists had advised that it would have taken three to nine months for the tumour to grow to 9cm from 1cm.

Ms Vaz's claim was rejected not because of non-disclosure on her part.

It was rejected because the Aviva plan excludes all pre-existing conditions regardless of whether there is disclosure or non-disclosure or whether the insured has knowledge of the condition.

Its 'pre-existing condition' clause states that 'any injury, illness, condition or symptom which originated...prior to the policy commencement date whether or not treatment, or medication, or advice, or diagnosis was sought or received' is excluded under the policy.

When contacted on the rationale for its policy, Aviva's chief executive, Mr Keith Perkins, said that by having an objective evaluation on when an illness originated, it is protecting the interests of the majority of its policyholders.

This guards against potential abuse which may lead to higher premiums if claims go up. 'If we rely on what customers know, we'll never know,' said Mr Perkins.

Aviva receives about 5,000 MyShield claims per year and less than 1 per cent of these claims are rejected because of pre-existing conditions.

Currently it has nearly 100,000 MyShield policyholders.

An insurance adviser told The Straits Times that Aviva's policy may come as a surprise to many medical insurance policyholders.

They probably assume that if they are unaware of a given condition at the time they sign up for the insurance policy, they would be covered, he said. And most of the time, they would be right.

A Straits Times check with rival insurers AIA, Great Eastern (GE), NTUC Income and Prudential found that they adhere to this principle and would have paid Ms Vaz's claim.

The clauses of GE and Prudential are similar. Prudential's clause states that 'a pre-existing condition is the existence of any signs or symptoms for which treatment, medication, consultation, advice or diagnosis has been sought or received by the life assured or would have caused an ordinary prudent person to seek treatment, diagnosis or cure, prior to the cover start date of this benefit or the date of any reinstatement'.

GE added in response to queries about Ms Vaz's situation that even if the doctor were able to estimate how long the condition had existed, it 'would not be fair' on the policyholder if the insurer declined the claim.

The clauses of AIA and Income are similar to each other, but more ambiguously phrased. AIA's clause states that 'any pre-existing illnesses, diseases, impairments or conditions from which the insured is suffering prior to the policy date...will not be covered', without specifying if the policyholder needs to be aware that he is suffering from the illness.

However, both insurers told The Straits Times that if a policyholder is genuinely unaware of a medical condition which is diagnosed only after the policy inception, they would pay the claim. AIA added that the insured must not have any symptoms at the time he took up the policy.

Aviva's Mr Perkins disagreed with that approach, maintaining that an independent medical opinion is crucial for an 'objective evaluation of claims'.

'A clause based on customers knowing about an illness cannot be objectively evaluated as it relies on us knowing customers' personal knowledge,' he said.

'I'm not concerned that we're different from other insurers. I'm happy that we are.'

Ms Vaz said Aviva's pre-existing condition clause put an insured person 'at a complete disadvantage'. Her bills have skyrocketed to more than $70,000 due to the operation, chemotherapy and radiation sessions.

She added that her fear was that her health care would suffer due to a lack of finances when she retires or if she is retrenched.

Aviva gave her an ex gratia payment of $3,128 which she has not cashed in yet.

When contacted, a Ministry of Health spokesman said that private insurers can choose to impose additional exclusions on their Shield plans should the insured have any pre-existing illnesses.

The Consumers Association of Singapore (Case) executive director Seah Seng Choon said that in his view, the clause is 'not fair' to customers if they are genuinely unaware and have no intention of omitting information on a medical condition.

He added that if there is such a clause, the insurer should stipulate the timeframe for such pre-existing conditions and highlight the requirement to the consumer.

*

Important Note: To claim $$$, please be confined at least for 6 hours? Shelved for future references.

From unknown source:


I would like to share a recent shocking "insurance claim" experience" and hope that lessonscan be learnt when buying and handling insurance claims. I hope this message can be passed on to your friends and relatives so that they are awared of how to claim insurance successfully.


I helped my father in law recently to claim for his cancer treatment under AIA healthshield "plan A" and got a shock when we receive a letter from AIA claim department stating the following:

" We refer to your claim and note from the medical bills that all consultations and treatments dated... were all done on an outpatient basis. Further, we also note that all bills did not fall within the schedule of outpatient hospital benefits as stated in AIA Healthshiled Policy Contract.

Therefore, we regret to advise that there is no claim payable in accordance with the definition stated in the AIA Healthshield Contract which reads:

" A confinement means any continuous period of hospitalization as an in patient and for which a daily room and board charge is incurred for a period not less than six hours."

My father in law was diagnosed and given treatment at National Cancer Centre Singapore, SGH. The consultant did many pre diagnostic teat and scan and when it was ascertained that my father in law is diagnosed with stage 2 cancer, he was treated with a continous course of radiotherapy that stretched for almost 2 months.

The tricky issue here is that the radiotherapy is done as a day treatment and no confinement is needed. Thus, no claims are payable according to AIA definition. But the thing is whether a patient needs to be confined in hospital is the call of the doctor and ironically the medical advances in cancer treatment has now allowed most treatable cancer patients to receive day care treatment so as not to disrupt their lifestyles and livelihood.

I would like to highlight that cancer treatment involved big sum of money and expects to spend recurring medical fees for follow up checks and medicine for the next few years following the treatment. A check with AIA claim department states that things would be different if my father inlaw is confined as the post outpatient fees and costs can be claimable. What a difference just because of the definition of "confinement". So do beware!

The point is no longer about whether my father in law claim is payable but what is more worrying is that many of us out there who thought that we are adequately covered and secured by purchasing medishield or private enhanced medishield to proctect ourselves against big medical bills when major illness strike will end up in rude shock when we cannot claim because of professional decisions given by doctors that are beyond patient control contradicts the claim contract. The question to ask is whether the private enhanced healthshield needs serious review as they are obviously outdated with the advances in medical treatment and procedures or is the MOH & CPF not aware these consequences as highlighted. This is ridiculous especially when I found out that majority of the cancer treatment nowadys are done on a day treatment basis without the need of confinement. If you need to be confined, that means one is terminally ill.

I thought this is an issue our Health Minister and ministry need to look into although they can claim that private medical health insurances are not within the control of MOH. But I bet to differ as medisave are allowed to buy selected private enhanced Healthshield policy. Thus, it is only reasonable to expect MOH or CPF work together to ensure they vet these private policy to ensure that they are still practical, relavant and fair to the patients.If these issues are not resolved, I would urge anyone who is undergoing treatment for any major illness and intends to claim for insurance to insist that the doctor confine them for at least 6 hours to qualify for claims. But then if everyone insists to be confined,valuable bed spaces and medical resources which could be more efficiently ultilised would be wasted. But what other choices does a patient have if he needs to claim for his healthshield nsurance?

Monday, February 05, 2007

Hypochondria Of The Heart

I’ve always known I can be a heartless person. I am also very proud. That’s why if the day should come to kick Somebody (loosely defined as anybody) out of my life, provided Somebody has done something unforgivable in my eyes and stayed unrepentant and/or nonchalant, I have no hesitation to do just that. Of course, the whole pride thing just made it easier. If I said I never wanna hang out again, er, it would take a lot for me to eat the words and come crawling back to you.

Easiest is the case if the Somebody is Someone Who Matters, because for good or bad, I am the sort who QC friendships. So I find it reprehensible to be let down after I have personally overseen to the screening myself. Your extent of betrayal, whether it is 1 or 10 on the scale, matters little and I see only the act of betrayal itself.

In a nutshell, the higher you are on my ladder rung, the more I care about you, and unfortunately, the more I need to subject you to a sublime friendship standard. Which to be fair, I abide by it too. If you are just a casual friend, hey, I probably won’t take anything you do or say too much to heart, because I really don’t care.

Then again, I’m also a softie at heart, a real wimp. Sob. So I don’t stay mad or bitter. Mostly I get upset and crestfallen: how could she/he do this to me if they are really my good friends? Then I pick myself up and life goes on, somewhat.

So what happens when you topped the rung and then you crashed out?I

t took 6 months, a very recent chance encounter with the Dad & sister, a do-or-die attitude, lots of mulling over 会不会很丢脸 and yet another fortuitously timed and chance-d online encounter before I took the plunge and spoke to the Best Friend again. Yes, Best Friend was the unceremonious axed ex for a while. I’m just really glad we are back to being Best Friends. Though I must concede reluctantly that she wins hands down: more heartless and with more hubris. Sigh.

So yesterday, we hanged out at Vivocity to do the girly stuff we have been missing out on and watched the equally girly chick flick Miss Potter.

T’is true: If it’s meant to be, you can always pick up from where you left, and you will always come back. She was waiting for me and so was I.

*

Friday saw Huixin, Ezo and myself together after hmmm 3 years. Nothing dramamama resulted in the long hiatus, only that Huxin went to New Zealand to escape reality and do a master degree. Now that she’s back for good, we are gonna fight back together and conquer Reality ie make it Our Reality lah.

*

My Friends. They are living proof that while the past can't be recaptured, and it never really was the way you recall it, certain things did happen and we are better for it. I need not live in nostalgia because those who were there, are here now and will continue to be. Alas, those who were there and not here now, I can only grieve periodically and hope that they come back to me the way I come back to Best Friend.

So long as there's a connection, we can hope? Like the DHS graduating class of 1996 (and we are talking about the cohort, not class per se) that took 10 years to manifest.
I look like this (See left the maiden in orange bebe off shoulder top). I tried to siam the photo taking but apparently it was quite imperative we had to do a passport photo each. I hope I'm slimmer in the next gathering. I'm just grateful not to look any older. Some of the hot people then have degenerated! Sob.
But returning to The Return:
But how long can you stand for being apart in the same place before leaving for good? When it seems the wait is such a futile and aimless one that you’ve almost forgotten why it is worth the wait and you no longer harbour the hope of anyone’s return. Is this where nostalgia comes in and the ghostly figure accompanies you through the absent years, fanning the dying flames insistently,relentlessly. But it never really was the way I recall it, was it. I made it better; I made you better and I kill myself with the improved version when I am really hankering after something lesser that I can jolly well do without. And what’s the point of knowing, as if the knowing can make any difference. We still wait.

Reflective nostalgia while grounded in longing, contemplating, and remembering, does not attempt to restore the past. You don't deny your longing, but you reflect on it somehow. It's a positive force that helps us explore our experience, and can offer an alternative to an uncritical acceptance of the present

Restorative nostalgia is not about memory and history but about heritage and tradition. It's often an invented tradition--a dogmatic, stable myth that gives you a coherent version of the past. Generally it's far removed in time, even prehistoric, as in the German myths that Wagner used for his operas.

More
here.